more important things than blogging

I've really been wanting to blog a lot this week, thanks to a few law students lighting a fire under my rear (and I mean that as a compliment...really...I do!). But writing is on the backburner for now, until baby Ira begins emerging from the woods. Much love to the Hays family. See their story at Brooklyn & Beyond.

what's this world coming to?

You have GOT to be kidding me. A kindergartner handcufffed for throwing a tantrum?!? Read about it here. Seems to me our police force could be using their time more effectively, like, say, tracking down sexual predators or doling out tickets to all the crazy drivers in Nashville.

ayelet waldman, part 1

It's been too long, my blogging buddies. Lately I've wrestled with exactly what the point of blogging is for me, or for anyone for that matter. All I really do is write about myself...doesn't that seem just a tad bit narcissistic? But I don't find myself thinking that about others' blogs. In fact, I rather enjoy reading stories about your lives and how you deal with life on a day-to-day basis. With that said, here is yet another entry about what Jana thinks!

Yesterday, on Oprah, the spotlight guest was writer and mother-of-four Ayelet Waldman. She was discussing her recent piece featured in the NY Times titled "Truly, Madly, Guiltily". I intend to comment on that article, as soon as I can get a hold of it in its entirety. As I was searching online for the essay, though, I came across another piece Waldman wrote entitled "Looking Abortion in the Face". The column describes her personal experience with abortion; she terminated a pregnancy after learning her child was "genetically compromised". Here is an excerpt:

"I believe that every woman is entitled to choose when and if to end a pregnancy. I also believe that to end a pregnancy like mine is to kill a fetus. Kill. I use that word very consciously and specifically. I have no regrets. I made a choice based on my own and my family's needs and limitations. I did not want to raise a genetically compromised child. I did not want my children to have to contend with the massive diversion of parental attention, and the consequences of being compelled to care for their brother after I died. I wanted a genetically perfect baby, and because that was something I could control, I chose to end his life."

Okay. Big breath. Where do I begin? Do I start by telling you that I cried when I read this? That my heart felt like it was physically aching? That as I was sharing her thoughts with Brandon, I felt like I could not get across to him the depth of my sadness? I tread lightly here because I have never been in Waldman's situation. I am not familiar with this kind of grief. So I'm wondering if I should make any comments about this at all. But I'll proceed...

I have always felt like abortion should be legal, yes, because if a woman chooses to terminate a pregnancy -- whatever her reason -- then, by all means, let it be done safely and in a sterile environment. However, I say "CHOOSE LIFE"! If we are having sex, a potential consequence is pregnancy. We all know this is a possibility. My thoughts are that the Giver of Life should be the only one who is allowed to take away life.

The comment I am especially saddened by, however, is Waldman's statement that she wanted a "genetically perfect baby". What qualifies as "genetically perfect"? Where do we draw the line on physical abnormalities? Brandon jokes about how he was born cross-eyed, club-footed, and asthmatic. I suppose a club-foot might be considered a physical abnormality. Maybe his mother should have aborted him.

I read another of Waldman's columns yesterday. She writes:"Four children is enough. So why can't I stop thinking about another? We've already experienced the heartbreak of terminating one pregnancy due to a genetic abnormality. With four healthy children, I tell myself it would be irresponsible to give the dice another throw. And yet... And yet..."

I wonder if her yearning for a fifth child is actually her heart grieving for the child that would-have-been. Guess we'll never know.

for the first time in my life...

...I love my job. I make that statement with great confidence. Yes, caring for a young child day-in, day-out can be maddening at times. And it's pretty much ALWAYS exhausting. There are moments when I wish I had a different job. But isn't that the way it is with ANY job? So yes. I love my job. This stay-at-home-mommy-thing ain't half-bad.

when i find a good thing, i just gotta share

Good Thing #1: www.allrecipes.com
I think the "secret ingredient" to this website's success is the ratings/reviews given by other people. Check out the website, and read the reviews on a recipe you'd like to try. So helpful! You might even throw away all your old-school cookbooks.

Good Thing #2: Mix & Match swimwear at www.landsend.com
NEAT!!! You can pick your top and your bottom seperately. Choose your color, style, pattern and size. So cool.

everyone sing with me now...it's all about me, jana...oops! i mean, it's all about you, jesus...

I was just reading a blog discussion about a certain faith-based institution who has chosen to not lower their flags in honor of the Pope. The discussion was thoughtful, theological, and all the contributors were men. I wanted to throw out my two cents but I felt intimidated, like I didn't have anything to share that they would deem worthwhile. And then I realized that instead of really pondering the issues, all I was thinking about was me, me, me! Always me! So self-centered. I highly doubt Jesus would have sat at his computer thinking about the most profound, intelligent comment he could write to impress a bunch of intellectual types. Maybe one day I'll stop navel-gazing so intently. Yeah. When pigs fly.

a few comments on excess

Our world is one of excess. It will always be, I suppose. People trying to fill up the holes in their souls with a ridiculous amount of food, alcohol, sex, money, people, job...pick your poison. (These things can all be good things...in moderation, of course. The issue here is EXCESS.) Why is it so hard to give up all the excessive crap? People talk about how they don't have time to get together with their families and friends. So what are we spending some much of our time doing??? Overeating...working overtime so we can have more spending money...taking that extra income and going shopping for furniture to fill up our oversized houses, for knick knacks to clutter up our shelves, and for shower gifts for acquaintances we barely know. All of it drains us of energy and time for God and our families and friends. As I read in another article online, all the aforementioned items are comparable to the enchanted, delectable dessert of Turkish Delight mentioned in the first Narnian Chronicle.

"Each piece [of Turkish Delight] was sweet and light to the very centre and Edmund had never tasted anything more delicious....soon he thought only of trying to shovel down as much Turkish Delight as he could, and the more he ate the more he wanted to eat....At last the Turkish Delight was all finished and Edmund was looking very hard at the empty box and wishing that [the White Witch] would ask him whether he would like some more....she knew, though Edmund did not, that this was enchanted Turkish Delight and that anyone who had once tasted it would want more and more of it, and would even, if they were allowed, go on eating it till they killed themselves."

And people eat too much...because it tastes so good.
And they work too much...because the paycheck is so big.
And they drink too much...because it numbs the pain.
And they buy too much...because it makes them feel powerful.
All to fill a void that cannot be filled, will never be filled, on this earth.
So they go on eating the Turkish Delight until they kill themselves.
If not physically, then at least -- and much worse, in my opinion -- spiritually.

When we will get it through our thick skulls that true joy is found only in relationship with God and other living beings?

grammy cheryl heading back to TX

Grammy Cheryl is on her way back to Texas, and I'm feeling a little sad. Similar to the way I felt when I was by myself with Rowan for the first time last year. Brandon went to work, my parents headed back home, and I felt very alone. I'm feeling that way now for some reason. Probably because we've had grandparents around for the past two weeks, thus our house has been busy and active. Now they're all gone. And I'm bummed. But it's also nice for it to be just me and the boys again, too.

My parents went with me to Rowan's checkup on Monday. Dr. M asked where they were from (the great and faraway land of Texas), and he went on to say that he felt like our society, especially large corporations that send their employees hither and yon, has done a great disservice to families. He said he thought it was extremely important for grandparents and extended families to live close to each other. Thank you, Dr. M, for giving the grandparents more ammunition!!! ;)

A few other highlights from this week:
- Rowan has an urticaria pigmentosa at his waistline, or as Dr. M explained in laymen's terms, a hive that he was born with and will have for the rest of his life probably.
- For those of you who don't know me that well, I'm a wannabe doctor. Just never been willing to commit a decade of my life to school/residency. So it was a treat to attend my pediatrician-friend's speech given to a roomful of doctors on Thursday morning. I just pretended like I was a doctor from out-of-town who had traveled in for the occasion. Plus my pal talked about the vaccines that are being developed for the rotavirus, and Rowan is part of the study! (That's right...a vaccine for a stomach bug...can I hear an "AMEN!" on that?)
- We watched an all-new episode of "Lost" with our friends E&L on Wed night. After a health scare regarding their in-utero baby, they received good news last week...everything's fine. Praise God. I really like E&L. They're funny. They're sassy. And they're not afraid to talk about poop.
- Rowan indulged in his first piece of birthday cake with his Paw, Gram and Grammy all present!